I don't know if you ever experience emptiness. Like you feel
that what you're striving toward is just not the adventure you'd hoped your
life would be. Sometimes I do. Not that I don't love my husband, my kids,
my family and friends, because I do, very much. And I also know that I am to
love them and serve them. I am also not trying to underplay the role of being a
parent, because to be honest parenting has been one of the most difficult
things God has called me to so far.
But it still feels like something's missing when I get wrapped
up in living my own life, when I get stuck in a routine, when life is all about
me and my family or my circle of people.
I get stuck.
I get stagnant.
I get bored... complacent.
COMPLACENT
I hate that word. I especially hate that word when it comes to
myself.
I like to think:
I serve,
I help,
I give,
I sacrifice.
I like to think that I'm moving forward in my growth, in this
journey. But the truth is when I feel a step of faith coming, I shudder. I
become frozen with fear.
Uh... FEAR
What if I make the wrong step?
What if I go the wrong way?
What if this isn't Gods plan for me?
What if he gets angry that I
made a mistake?
As if missteps aren't part of following Him. But instead of
stepping out into the unknown or failing, I choose to stick by what I know,
what's comfortable. It's easier that way isn't it? Staying with the people you
know? The things you know? The place you know? It's scary to go some place new
with no one or nothing we know. Even if what we are leaving behind is really
bad or dysfunctional.
When I think about it I've learned a lot about taking faith
steps from my 1 year old. She would step fall. Step, step, fall. And
then one day she didn't fall all the way down the hallway. Sometimes she
would trip, fall, bang her head and cry. Then I'd comfort her and
she'd get up and do it again. Now I swear she runs and it seems like I
can't keep up with her. All because she tried to take that first step. I
doubt it was comfortable to fall.
Those who have adventure are
those
who choose to GO despite
their discomfort.
You know before Jesus ascended to heaven he said something
similar:
“GO and make disciples of ALL nations, baptizing them in the
name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,” ~Matthew 28:19
Notice how he says we have to actually GO somewhere. We cannot
stay where we are and also go do what he's asked. It implies action. We don't
have to go overseas to share with others, but we do have to go somewhere: to
the homeless man outside Stater Bros, to the single mom struggling next door,
to the the annoying (possibly crazy) old lady that lives across the street, to
the cranky complaining co-worker. We need to GO outside of our circle, to those
on the outskirts, the ones we don't feel comfortable with. You know who it is
for you.
If we as the church don't follow this call and are not being
the church, then who will? Do we think the pastors and missionaries will do
it for us? If so, then we will miss out on all the fullness this adventure we
call life is meant to be. We will be living in disobedience. Sort of like
Jonah. If you don't know the story it goes like this:
God tells Jonah to GO to Ninevah and tell them they're living in
sin and that God is going to punish them. Jonah says NO! and runs the
opposite way. Well to be precise, he jumps on a boat and sails away. Then
God causes a storm all around the boat. Jonah tells the people on the boat to
throw him overboard because God is causing the storm. They throw him
overboard. He gets swallowed by a fish. ( I know right?) Then the fish
spits him out in the same place God called him the first time. God tells
him GO. So he goes, sort of. He prophesies on the outskirts of the city, but
somehow the word gets all the way to the king and the whole town fasts and
repents and grieves that they were so far away from God. God spares
them.
I think I'd rather go the first time rather than face all the
consequences that complacency brings. But...
If we GO
It won't be safe.
It won't be comfortable.
It will definitely come with:
failure
risk
and lots of heartache and pain.
But do we really want to live comfortable, safe lives, when
Jesus has an amazing adventure waiting for us?
I've decided that I don't want to live it safe anymore.
I want to follow Jesus wherever he takes me.
I want to be filled to the brim.
I don't want to feel empty, or like something's missing anymore.
So I'm ready to take my next scary faith step into the unknown.
And if we're a follower of Jesus let's not forget:
Jesus was on the outskirts.
He never fit what everyone thought someone "religious"
should look like. He hung out with all the crazies. All the "extra grace
required." He served those people. He healed them. He loved
them with abandon.
And then He was crucified (with the support of many of those he
served) on the outskirts of town. That's where the trash was. The
murderers. The lepers. Jesus was taken outside of town.
If he was willing to live and die on the outskirts. Shouldn't we
as his followers be willing to do the same?
I don't know what that step looks like for you. Maybe there was
something you felt he called you to a long time ago, but because of hurt you
took the safe way. Or maybe he asked you to do something and through
justification you thought, that wasn't really God, that was just me.
Or maybe you don't really care much about God but you've felt his nudge a long
time ago to give your life to him, but you chose to keep going your own way.
Maybe now is the time for that first step of faith. The first
step to the crazy God-sized life you've always wanted. One that you will never
get bored with.
Remember God is always calling us to one more step.
To hand over a little more of ourselves.
And he always has so much more for us then we can even think or
imagine!
Are you ready to run into the
life that God has for you?
